


A Sea of Stars

by fallingdownthewishingwell



Series: Where the Ocean Meets the Sky [1]
Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Also I think I'm bad at tagging, Also there are some swears, And dialogue is kinda hard, Angst, Apparently I can only write stuff with angst, But they don't know how to express their feelings, But they're both crushing on each other, Just enjoy the space gays, M/M, Wow sorry guys, beware the swears, this is kind of a mess
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-07-11
Updated: 2016-07-11
Packaged: 2018-07-22 21:41:17
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,092
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7454893
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fallingdownthewishingwell/pseuds/fallingdownthewishingwell
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Lance exploded. “No, you don’t understand! You don’t have a family back home!” It took him two seconds to realize what he’d said, and two more before the hurt look on Keith’s face really hit him.</p>
<p>Keith’s expression was frozen, his eyes colder than Lance had ever seen.  Keith said, “You’re right, I don’t.”<br/>~~~<br/>In which Keith thinks he's awful at comforting people, but it turns out Lance is even worse. Not that it's a competition or anything.</p>
            </blockquote>





	A Sea of Stars

Keith was the first to notice how quiet Lance was being. Maybe he first noticed when Lance accidentally hit Keith in the head during training, but instead of teasing him for letting his guard down he just mumbled an apology and shuffled off. Or maybe it was during dinner when Princess Allura said, “this time we’ll make Zarkon go down on us!” with a straight face and Lance didn’t burst out laughing. But it was most clear when he, Shiro, Hunk and Pidge were discussing the specific sound laser guns made and Lance didn’t even offer his own completely wrong sound. 

Finally at dinner the whole team knew something was up. After all, dinner wasn’t the same at all without Lance’s smartass comments and bad flirting attempts. Lance just kept pushing his food goo around his plate, staring into space. Once they’d finished, Lance stood too fast and mumbled something along the lines of “I’m just gonna… check some space stuff” and rushed out of the room.

“What’s up with him? Pidge asked, squinting in the direction he’d left in

“I don’t now,” Hunk said, “but it doesn’t look good. I don’t think I’ve ever seen him so quiet.” He raised his eyebrows. “You know, I though it would be nice for him to quiet down some, but this is just weirding me out.” 

Shiro nodded and looked concerned. “Do any of you have any idea why? He seemed normal this morning, has anything happened since?”

Keith tried to pinpoint when Lance started acting weird—well, weird for Lance, that is. Then he remembered how, just before they’d started training, Lance had asked the computer what the date was on Earth. He hadn’t paid much attention to it, but come to think of it Lance had tensed up at the answer. “I think I might have an idea,” Keith told everyone, and he went off in search of their blue paladin.

***

August 19. August 19. August 19. It was like a chant in Lance’s head, and it wouldn’t stop no matter how hard he tried, and the day passed in a blur. He hadn’t thought about how long they had been gone, not really, not seriously. Sure, defending the universe was gonna be a full time job, but what was the point of all that if he wasn’t even around for his big sis today; her due date? 

He was gonna be an uncle—if he wasn’t already. God, that made him sound so old, and Sonia would definitely tell him so. In his head he could picture bantering with her so easily, along with the rest of the family. He imagined meeting his baby niece or nephew, but no matter how hard he tried he couldn’t quite picture the baby’s face. A beautiful new family member, and all Lance wanted to do was see their face, know what ridiculous name Sonia had come up with since she’d always had such a dramatic flair, even worse than his (okay, maybe not quite).

But they would probably think the family was still the same size as before since Lance had been gone for ages now. They probably thought he was dead. 

Lance sulked up to the observatory deck where a huge window ran the length of the room. It looked as if the stars were within reach, but Lance knew better than that. Earth and its star weren’t even visible from wherever the heck they were. Home was completely out of his reach.

So he curled up and stared out the window even though his damp eyes made it impossible to make out all the stars anymore. Lance didn’t know how long he sat there before he was jolted out of his moping by a loud crash down the hallway followed by some very creative curses. Lance couldn’t keep a smirk off his face. He would know that voice anywhere. It seemed Keith had run into Coran’s ridiculously unbalanced pile of engine tools on his way in. 

Lance roughly wiped his eyes on his sleeve as he heard Keith approach. He didn’t want Keith to see him like this. So, naturally, he’d pretend like nothing was wrong. No problema.

“Hey, man,” Keith said behind him, “you… you okay up here?”

Keith’s gentle tone took Lance’s breath away for a second. It had been so long since that tone was directed at him—and never without Lance having a life-threatening injury to go along with it. But by how fast his heart was going he might as well have one.

Lance cleared his throat after a second. “Who, me?” He looked around theatrically without actually looking at Keith. “Oh no, I’m good—more than good! Couldn’t be better! I was just wondering if the, uh… glass up here was really as clear as Coran said!” Lance nodded, and with a satisfied smile he finally looked at Keith, who looked less than impressed with his answer.

“Right.” Keith said, eyebrow cocked. Did Lance really think that was at all convincing? Fine then. If Lance wasn’t going to tell him what was wrong, they’d do this the hard way.

Lance tensed up as Keith settled down on the floor next to him, just a couple inches closer than necessary. The dramatic smile slipped off his face. If he’d thought it was hard to breathe before, it was downright impossible now with Keith staring at him like that. 

Lance tried to think of some joke to diffuse the tension (was he imagining it?) but for once no words came. With the day he’d been having, he couldn’t think straight, in either sense of the word, if he was being honest with himself. His emotions were all over the place, and Lance wasn’t sure he could keep it together long enough to get through a conversation with stupidly cute mullet head.

“Lance, come on, you’ve been off all day. Everyone’s worried about you. You really can tell me what’s wrong—I mean, if you want to.” Keith muttered towards the end. He wouldn’t be surprised if Lance blew him off at this point. They had been ‘rivals’ in Lance’s mind for a long time, so Keith was half sure nothing he ever said to Lance would eve be taken seriously.

Lance shook his head and swallowed thickly. He did want to tell him, but the more he thought about saying it out loud the more it made his eyes burn. 

“Lance?” Keith said, leaning forward, trying to catch Lance’s eye as the other looked out the window determinately. Keith twiddled his thumbs, feeling awkward, and he didn’t quite notice the way Lance blinked his eyes rapidly. 

Deep breaths, Lance. Finally, he forced himself to say, “It’s just that, um, today was a big day for Sonia—my oldest sister. Her, uh, due date.”

Keith was embarrassed by how long it took him to realize what Lance meant by that. He was sure the shock showed easily on his face. “Oh, a baby,” he said stupidly. 

Wow, Keith thought, Shiro definitely would’ve been the better choice to send after Lance. Why had he rushed after Lance so quickly? Keith was so out of his depth here. What would Shiro say to something like this?

Lance had only curled in on himself more while Keith looked at him with his mouth open, unsure of what to say. Lucky for him, Lance continued.

“It’s just that, I really thought I’d be there for her today. It’s the first kid any of my siblings have had. I’m sure Mom is going nuts” A small smile passed over Lance’s features before fading again. With an oddly sober expression he said, “I should’ve been there. I should’ve been a part of it. But, no, instead of that they probably think I’m dead while I’m actually here, floating around in a space castle quiznak knows where, not even sure I’ll ever see Earth again!” 

Lance grit his teeth in frustration and his hands tightened into fists. Keith watched him with concern, wanting to reach out but not sure how. 

“I know you miss them a lot,” Keith said carefully, “but I’m sure you’ll get to see them soon-“

“You have no way of knowing that,” Lance choked out, body rigid, glaring out into space.

“I know, man, but I get it--“

Lance exploded. “No, you don’t understand! You don’t have a family back home!” It took him two seconds to realize what he’d said, and two more before the hurt look on Keith’s face really hit him.

Keith’s expression was frozen, his eyes colder than Lance had ever seen. Keith said, “You’re right, I don’t.” 

Lance felt as if a weight had fallen on his chest. Holy crow, he thought, that was such a shit thing to say. Unconsciously his hand reached out towards Keith, saying, “Oh god, Keith, I didn’t mean--“ 

“I think it’s pretty clear what you meant.” Keith said, leaning away and not meeting Lance’s eyes. He stood and turned his back on the window to the stars.

Before he could step away, though, Lance grabbed his hand and said “Look, Keith, I didn’t mean that! I’m really sorry, please just… don’t leave”

Keith looked down at their clasped hands but for once he just couldn’t meet Lance’s eyes. “You have no idea how lucky you are to have a family back there to miss you while you’re out here fighting,” Keith told him in a low voice.

Lance swallowed the lump in his throat, struggled, and finally forced himself to say, “You’re right. I—I didn’t mean to say that, Keith, I’m sorry. Really.” Keith still wouldn’t look at him, though, and his hand was limp in Lance’s. So Lance pushed himself up too, barely registering how close together they now stood. He forced Keith to look him in the eyes and told him, “I’m sorry,” even softer this time.

Keith’s heartbeat was pounding in his ears. His hand felt warm inside Lance’s, only Keith wished he were touching him for literally any other reason. He hadn’t really known how to deal with Sad Lance, but god, Apologetic Lance was even worse. And he’d just had to bring up the most painful things. 

Keith just couldn’t do this right now, he wasn’t sure his heart could take it. All his emotions were clashing inside him—his anger, frustration, guilt, concern, and nostalgia, bleeding into the feelings for Lance, whatever the fuck they were. And looking up into Lance’s eyes made him worry that those feelings were much stronger than he’d realized. 

He pulled his hand out of Lance’s. “It’s fine, it doesn’t matter anyway. Our team is our family now, that’s all that matters,” Keith said stiffly.

“Right, family…” Lance couldn’t keep the disappointment out of his voice. No matter how hard he tried he just couldn’t think of Keith in a brotherly way. Keith was too hot for that, Lance thought, it’s not as if that was his fault.

Keith nodded and headed for the door at the far side of the room. He’d only gone a few steps when Lance’s voice stopped him.

“Keith?” Lance said tentatively. 

When Keith turned back towards him, he could’ve sworn Lance was blushing as he looked down at his feet. Wow, Keith thought, Embarrassed Lance was a pretty cute sight.

Lance continued. “Thanks for, uh, looking for me.” Ugh that sounded so lame, he thought. But Keith smiled at him so maybe it wasn’t that bad.

“Anytime. But, you know, you can just tell us these things. We’re all a team, we can’t shut each other out,” Keith said. Then he cautiously added, “And you can always talk to me, Lance, okay? I mean—like, if you don’t want to announce stuff to everyone? Yeah. Just so you know.”

Lance’s eyes shone. “Okay, man. Thanks. And, uh, you too. Can talk to me, I mean,” Lance said, and it felt like the weight had been lifted off his chest. And when Keith smiled at him again Lance felt even lighter.

Keith tilted his head back in the direction of the door. “Well now that that’s sorted out, we’d better head back to the others” Lance agreed, and followed him to through the doorway. But after a couple steps, Keith stopped Lance with a hand on his shoulder. He said, “For what it’s worth, I think you’re gonna be a great uncle.” 

And even though they’d left the starry room behind them, Lance was sure he saw an ocean of stars in Keith’s eyes.

**Author's Note:**

> Hallo there, so this was my first attempt at klance, so I'd love to know what you think!  
> Also I'm considering writing more for this? Cause now they have to go to each other and talk about their feelings. So that should be an adventure.  
> Thanks for reading!


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